You maidens and wives and young widows, rejoice!
Declare your thanksgiving with heart and with voice!
Since waters were waters, I dare boldly say,
There ne'er was such cause for a thanksgiving day!
For from London town there's lately come down
Four able physicians that never wore gown:
Their physic is pleasant, their dose it is large,
And you may be cured without danger or charge.
They have a new drug which is called The Close Hug,
Which will mend your complexion and make you look smug--
A sovereign balsam, which once well applied,
Though grieved at the heart, the patient ne'er died.
In the morning you need not be robbed of your rest,
For in your warm beds their physic works best;
And though in the taking some stirring's required,
The motion's so pleasant you cannot be tired.
On your backs you must lie with your body raised high,
And one of these doctors must always be night,
Who still will be ready to cover you warm,
For if you take cold, all physic doth harm.
On silver and gold they never lay hold,
For what comes so freely they scorn should be sold.
Then join with the doctors, and heartily pray
Their power of healing should never decay!